How I found the perfect vibrator, one toe-curling orgasm at a time

Nipple orgasms and other sextech adventures

The unassuming bottom drawer of my vanity cabinet houses, in addition to the usual suspects (books, underwear, a plethora of beauty products), my most precious toys. No, these aren’t vintage Barbie dolls or Hot Wheels collectables, but equally colourful battery-operated adult toys that boast an extra feature—they promise an unfailing orgasm. Before the existence of this drawer, I would wander the lanes of Mumbai’s Fort neighbourhood looking for ‘massagers’, and debating whether spending ₹6,000 on a vibrator was justifiable. The sexual curiosity of a young woman knows no bounds.

Fortunately, with the growing accessibility of pleasure products, I no longer need to scramble for vibrators and sex toys. According to Allied Market Research, a research and trend analysis firm, the global sexual wellness market reached its peak at $20.6 billion in 2023. Closer home, the Indian sexual wellness market is estimated to reach $2.09 billion by 2030.

The road to female pleasure

I often jest that my sexual curiosity is driving this exponential growth, but on a more serious note, credit goes to sex educators and sexual wellness brands sprouting across the country. If it weren’t for brands like imBesharam and educators like Seema Anand, I’d still be resorting to my pillow for orgasms. Instead, in recent years, vibrators with multiple speeds and sensations have helped me achieve what once seemed elusive.

“Vibrators and other forms of sextech help us break out of the current conditioning around pleasure,” says Tanisha RK, co-founder at The Sangya Project, a sextech company dedicated to satisfying sexual curiosity. She also explains how existing norms focus solely on women’s childbearing function, denying them the opportunity to explore their bodies as instruments of pleasure. Leeza Mangaldas, sexuality educator and founder of the intimacy brand Leezus, echoes this sentiment, adding that women have been taught to ‘tolerate’ sex without necessarily enjoying it. Vibrators disrupt this conditioning, providing a chance for women to understand their sexual selves better.

However, even when sex feels great, over-emphasis on penetration as the central act often prevents women from prioritising their pleasure. “Penetration alone doesn’t help most women orgasm. Clitoral stimulation, whether on its own or alongside penetration, is the most reliable route to orgasm for most vulvas,” elaborates Mangaldas.

Vibrators can make intimacy radically enjoyable while fostering vulnerability and self-awareness. Pallavi Barnwal, certified intimacy coach and founder of Get Intimacy, believes that vibrators must be viewed as friends. “The mainstream still views sex toys as an anomaly or abnormality,” she says, highlighting that vibrators can unlock new and unexpected avenues of pleasure.

However, as exciting as it is to witness the evolution of sex toys and vibrators, manoeuvring through the abundant choices can be equally overwhelming. If you’re just getting started, Tanisha RK advises letting your hands lead the way—exploring your body playfully and intimately will help you pinpoint your erogenous zones. Once you identify the areas and touches that stimulate you, buying a vibrator becomes easier. If you’re still unsure, Mangaldas advises opting for toys that offer clitoral stimulation since they’re user-friendly and guarantee an orgasm.

Whether you’re a newbie just entering the world of vibrators or an aficionado looking to heat things up in partnered play, here’s an exhaustive list of personal recommendations that promise to heighten your pleasure.

Tried-and-tested-vibrators that deliver peak performance

For nervous newbies: Bullet vibrators

Orgasm type: Nipple orgasm, clitoral orgasm

This is the ideal choice for beginners looking to dip their toes (or other areas) into the world of vibrators. I thoroughly enjoy how versatile they are, allowing for experimentation and targeted stimulation. For instance, using it to stimulate my nipples (on the middle-speed setting) made my eyes roll back. Yup, bullet vibrators made me realise nipple orgasms are real.

Verdict: The fact that these look like lipstick helps shield them from the gaze of my ever-curious mother. Manzuri’s Glimmer (₹2,999) is a remote-controlled bullet vibrator featuring 10 modes to play around with. I love its ability to oscillate between differently-paced vibration modes, which eventually led me to that startling nipple orgasm.

For high-speed action: Wand vibrators

Orgasm type: Clitoral orgasm

Sex and the City made me buy this one, and I have Samantha Jones to thank for the recommendation. A wand vibrator was the first sex toy I ever tried, and I awkwardly fumbled my way to an orgasm. Pro tip: Don’t try inserting a wand vibrator; it’s not a good feeling. When I finally figured out that these vibrators are only meant for external use, things got a lot more pleasurable.

Verdict: The fact that wand vibrators have the highest vibration frequency per minute piqued my interest, and earned my approval. A durable and high-powered option is LoveDepot’s PlusOne Vibrating Wand (₹4,303). Ten minutes with this resulted in an orgasm so loud that I’m certain my mother heard me moan from a room away.

For clit-flick lovers: Suction vibrators

Orgasm type: Intense clitoral orgasm

I’m certain that I’m not the only woman who prioritises clitoral stimulation over other forms of stimulation. And because oral sex scores higher than penetrative sex for me, I haven’t been able to resist suction vibrators. Their ability to deliver intense orgasms by creating sensations around the clitoris that mimic oral sex makes them a top-ranking choice.

Verdict: Leezu’s Love Bug (₹5,999) isn’t just an extremely powerful suction vibrator, but also an incredibly discreet massager. On the days I miss my partner’s skills, this tiny device with its five suction modes gets the job done.

For the eggplant-averse: Palm vibrators

Orgasm type: Almost-orgasm, clitoral orgasm

Palm vibrators are made for sexually inquisitive women who are intimidated by the typically phallic design of vibrators. That really isn’t me, but I was piqued by the unique, paperweight-like shape of palm vibrators. I’ll admit, I underestimated just how powerful these tiny devices can be. I was only convinced of their potential during one of my (very successful) sessions where I placed the vibrator near the clitoris, not directly on it.

Verdict: A flexible and fun-sized vibrator always scores extra brownie points in my books, and that’s why Palm (₹2,499) by MyMuse receives top points from me. Its bendy shape allows it to perform the task of stimulating multiple erogenous zones. Let’s just say that placing it between your thighs and close to your clitoris lead me to an interesting discovery.

For a double whammy: Rabbit vibrators

Orgasm type: Blended orgasm

Okay, Sex and the City made me buy the rabbit vibrator too. I mean, if Charlotte had to be dragged out of her house because she couldn’t stop using one, I had to get in on the action. Until rabbit vibrators entered my life, double stimulation sounded like an impossible dream. These vibrators contain two motors instead of one—the first one works on clitoral stimulation while the other takes care of vaginal stimulation. With that combination, suddenly, blended orgasms were no longer a myth to me. If you want to get it right the first time, try laying on your back and inserting the vibrator, instead of sitting up straight.

Verdict: Luckily, I wasn’t a newbie when I tried The Sangya Project’s Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator (₹7,199), otherwise, I would have given myself an embarrassing injury, considering this vibrator can get pretty heated (literally). The tip of the thruster heats up to a temperature of 42 degrees—the only kind of heat wave you can get down with.

For the multitaskers: Wearable vibrators

Orgasm type: Blended orgasm, clitoral orgasm

I imagined we’d be living in a world with flying cars by 2024; we got wearable vibrators instead, and I’m not complaining. The prospect of having an orgasm with my clothes on is delightful, and time-efficient. Initially, trying to understand its placement was a little confusing, but all I had to do was figure out which end goes where. While I’ve sneakily used this on myself in the midst of errands, you can turn up the kink by allowing your partner to control the vibration.

Verdict: I loved the sleek design of WeVibe Wireless Wearable Vibrator (₹25,999) (available on imBesharam), which made it extremely easy to insert, as well as place above the clitoris. Not going to lie, every time I use it, I feel like Kiara Advani in Lust Stories, except I’m in charge of my own orgasm.

Personally, each sexual experience with a vibrator, whether solo or with my partner, has been fulfilling in myriad ways. I’ve gone from achieving orgasms to discovering orgasms that I didn’t even know existed (hello, blended orgasms). Had I been left to my own devices, aka my hands, I’d possibly be encountering multiple sprains instead of orgasms.